As we ramp up for events this year, I’ve been thinking deeply about what works—and what doesn’t—when it comes to networking. One thing is abundantly clear: traditional networking tactics, like elevator pitches and forced small talk, are increasingly ineffective in today’s business climate.
At too many networking events, it feels like someone rang a bell and out come the pitches—fast, impersonal, and often tone-deaf. Attendees dart from one conversation to the next, rehearsed lines at the ready, hoping for a magical moment of business alignment. But that moment rarely comes. Why? Because human connection isn’t built on scripted monologues.
The truth is, people don’t want to be pitched. They want to be seen, heard, and remembered. What stands out in a sea of business cards isn’t your company’s value proposition—it’s the story that makes you human.
I’ve attended events that completely flipped the script. Instead of elevator pitches, attendees are asked to share what makes them awesome in just 30 seconds. While that may sound like a gimmick, it forces people to lead with authenticity, not an agenda. It’s not about boasting; it’s about connecting. Some share meaningful personal achievements. Others talk about a passion project or an aspiration. And what emerges is not a pitch, but a story—one that sticks.
One example I’ll never forget: I met a man named David Roux. He didn’t lead with his job title. Instead, he told me he was a rock drummer who played every Sunday at his church. That detail stood out, but so did his deeper mission—he was a life coach for young people. We talked about purpose, mentorship, and identity. Later, I hired him to coach my own daughter. That connection never would have happened if he’d started by handing me a business card and a rehearsed pitch.
The Problem with Pitches
Traditional elevator pitches fall short for several reasons:
- Assumption: A pitch assumes the person in front of you wants to be sold to. Most don’t.
- Ignorance: You can’t solve a problem you don’t understand—and you can’t understand someone’s challenges if you haven’t taken time to listen.
- Misalignment: The people you meet at a networking event often aren’t your target customer. But someone in their network might be. A memorable conversation can lead to a referral. A generic pitch won’t.
What You Should Share Instead
So, how do you make the most of networking without falling into the pitch trap? Shift your approach from selling to connecting:
- Awesome: Say something memorable that defines who you are beyond your job title. Maybe it’s your military service. Maybe it’s a unique passion or a formative life event. People remember people, not résumés.
- Trust: Learn who they know. Build trust not just with them, but with the people they influence. If they’re a trusted advisor to your ideal client base, treat that relationship with care and invest in it.
- Teach: Offer value. Instead of a pitch, explain a problem you solve or share a client success story. Help the other person understand how they can refer you, not just what you do.
- Ask: Don’t be afraid to ask for help—genuinely and respectfully. Make it clear that your goal isn’t to make a sale on the spot but to build a relationship that could lead to value for both of you.
The Real Value Is Outside the Room
Great networkers understand that the real opportunity isn’t in the room—it’s beyond it. If there are 50 people at an event, your best prospects probably aren’t among them. However, each attendee knows dozens, if not hundreds, of others. One memorable conversation can ripple out to your ideal customer through a simple recommendation.
By abandoning the elevator pitch and focusing instead on authenticity, trust-building, and shared value, you position yourself not just as a professional—but as someone worth remembering.
And once you’ve ditched the pitch, what’s next? It’s learning to ask the right questions. If you’re interested in how to turn conversations into lasting relationships, read our other article on the art of asking better questions.
Pitch Less. Ask More. Win More
Related Martech Zone Content
